Simpsons Porn Story: Purple Swirly Vortex Chapter 3

Sorry for not
updating I havent had many ideas. Thank you to booklover, for
putting this story on alert. It means a lot! As for reviews

1wilson1:Thank you
soooo much! Have a cookie!

Evil Riggs: Call me
ignorant, but I dont really get your review

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St. Gabriels
Orphanage was known for taking in poor children off the streets, so
when a little boy named Ralph Wiggum was brought in one day, it
didnt seem like such a big deal. The orphanage staff brought Ralph
to the Director so that he could learn his way around.

The Director was
tall, thin, and had a short temper. So the staff told Ralph that he
shouldnt make the Director angry. Sadly, Ralph was too busy
playing with his socks to hear the warning.

They hurriedly
deposited him in the Directors office, then left. None of them
wanted to be around if he blew his top.

The Director took
pride in his office. He kept it dark most of the time, because too
much light was bad for his precious oil paintings. He also had
many valuable antiques just waiting to be broken.

So, youre
the new child. Ralph, we have a few ru-

The Director was
interrupted by one thing- Ralph had found a lighter in his desk and
was setting the only Leonardo DaVinci painting he had on fire.

NNNNNNNOOOOOOO!
the Director screamed.

By now, most of
the orphanage had caught on fire and was being evacuated.

The leprecon
tells me to burn things! Ralph said happily.

Whats that
Mr. Leprecon? I need to burn a bag of Cheese-Its? Well, youre the
boss!

So Ralph skipped
into the city to find some Cheese-Its to burn.

Back in
Springfield

It had been
three hours since Homer had been brought back, and now the town had
gathered at a second meeting to decide what to do next.

Ah, er, ah, I
now call this meeting to order. We need to decide who to bring back
next. The Hindu, or Chief Wiggums kid. Mayor Quimby drawled.

Suddenly, voices
erupted from nowhere, shouting out who should be sent back next.

The Hindu! We
need the Kwik-E Mart! No, no, the boy! Children are the
future! Who cares about the future? KWIK-E MART!

Things were
getting out of hand fast. Maybe it was the gunfire, the ostriches
battling, or even the fact that people were throwing cupcakes, but
Mr. Burns decided that enough was enough!

Smithers, what
is the fastest way to get these buffoons to shut up? Mr. Burns
asked his ever-loyal lackey.

Smithers glanced
around, and after making sure that no one one was listening, started
to whisper.

Well, do you
mean permanently? Because- Smithers was interrupted.

No, no, I still
need more henchmen to do my dirty work, this town is full of idiots
who will look upon me as a GOD!

Even Smithers had
to sweatdrop at this declaration.

Ah, whatever
you say, sir. Well, I do have an air horn in the trunk of the limo

So Smithers went
to fetch the air horn.

When he came back,
Mr. Burns snatched the air horn from Smithers, and started blasting
away with it.

MWAHAHAHA! BOW
BEFORE ME! he screamed.

Smithers sighed.
Im doubling his medicine after this. He muttered.

After everyone had
calmed down, and Mr. Burns was pried from his air horn, they got back
to business. In other words, they were still arguing but without the
guns and ostriches.

APU!
RALPH! DOUGHNUTS!!

Everyone looked at
Homer.

What? Im hungry!
he whined.

Marrggggggeeee, can
we go to Krusty Burger? Marge nodded absently. Maybe later.

Lisa watched the
chaos with disgust, until an idea popped into her head. Everybody,
stop! I have an idea!

Everyone abruptly
stopped fighting. Listen to an 8-year old girl? Why not? Ned
Flanders said. OK, keep talking.

Okayyyy
Anyways, we could settle this with a game of Rock, Paper, Scissors.
Chief Wiggum and Manjula can go against each other, winner takes
all.

Ah, Im in,
but only if Manjula is in too. Chief Wiggum said.

Manjula sniffed. Of
Im in. Apu is the only source of money, and sometimes he gives
special one cent discounts at the Kwik-E Mart.

Alright
everyone, make room, this could get violent. Lisa called out.

Everyone started
forming a circle around Manjula and Chief Wiggum, who were circling
each other warily.

Alright,
Lisa yelled, on three, you go. One Two Three GO!!!!

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Meanwhile, in the
City that Shall Remain Nameless, Ralph was having a blast burning
Cheese-Its and other snack foods. Sadly, he accidentally set the
entire Cheese-It factory on fire.

Soon, the entire
city was talking about the fire, and the supposed aronist, who was
described as a small boy wearing rubber pants.

Nobody was taking
this report seriously, until someone caught Ralph skipping around a
burning bag of Cheese-Its, singing Im Walking On Sunshine.
Ralph was brought to the nearby police station for questioning.

Ralph was put in a
room with nothing but three chairs and a table. After about then
minutes, two officers (who will be called officers A and B) entered
and sat down.

Ok, kid, why
did you burn down that Cheese-It factory? Officer B asked.

The leprecon tells
me to burn things! Ralph said happily.

Okkkkkkkkkkaaaaaaayyyyyyy
Officer A said. Well, on to the rest of the questions, I suppose

0o0oOne Hour
Latero0o0

For the last
time, THE SKY ISNT PURPLE!!!!! Officer A screamed.

For the past hour, they
had been questioning Ralph, but all of his answers were strange to
them.

Hey, if someone
told you that money is for eating, you would be weirded out too,
right? So the officers decided to call it a night after Ralph told
them that the world was shaped like a hexagon.

They led him to one
of their special cells with padded walls and flame proof
everything.

Bye-bye talking
fishies! Ralph called.

The officers sighed.
Tomorrow was going to be a looooooong day

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Well, heres chapter
2! Again, sorry for the long wait, theres been lots of things
going on, and I havent had much motivation. I still havent
quite decide who will win at Rock-Paper-Scissors, so you can vote if
you want. Thanks for reading,

Winged wondergirl